DH and I had a long discussion last night about a lot of things that have been bothering the both of us. We stayed up until midnight just talking. It was really nice to be having an actual conversation with each other instead of going about our various tasks and being mostly centered on Aiden. Although, we did beat each other up a bit, gently of course, it was still good to get it out and I hope it will help in the long run.
He basically would like me to work on how I word things because apparently I am coming off as being insensitive and mean. He tried to give me examples of how I do this. I guess its always hard to see it when you're analyzing your own actions. I have a short fuse/quick temper and I think its even worse now with the whole PMS/hormonal shifts that my body hasn't gone through in well over a year. It does a number on my mentality.
I asked him to be more helpful, instead of me having to ask him to help out. I also asked him again to please try to be more attentive when I am speaking. My biggest pet peeve is having to repeat myself which is something I need to do quite frequently around my DH.
We made an agreement that he would cook one dinner during the week and I would do the rest. I think that seems very reasonable and fair. The weekends are left up to circumstances. He admitted to me that sometimes he comes home and wonders what I've done all day. I admitted that I spend way more time on the computer than is necessary. So I am making an effort to be more aware of my computer usage and try to get my housework done first.
We also discussed our finances and he is considering letting me get a job. He was not agreeable to it the last time we discussed it. But he did let me in on what exactly is going on with our finances and it looks like we should be breathing easier come June. We've got one loan that will be paid off then and the money we've been paying on it every month can get put to other uses. My car loan is going to be paid off in 2.5 years. Thats not too bad. So we'll see what we decide about me working.
The last thing that we discussed was my being able to have ME time. I really feel like I need to get out by myself more for my own sanity. Just being able to run to the store without all this careful planning and waiting, plus 20 minutes to get a little boy out the door, would be soooooo nice. Even being able to sit on the computer for a few minutes alone without interruption would qualify.
So we'll see how things turn around in our house. I really hope this helps us.
He basically would like me to work on how I word things because apparently I am coming off as being insensitive and mean. He tried to give me examples of how I do this. I guess its always hard to see it when you're analyzing your own actions. I have a short fuse/quick temper and I think its even worse now with the whole PMS/hormonal shifts that my body hasn't gone through in well over a year. It does a number on my mentality.
I asked him to be more helpful, instead of me having to ask him to help out. I also asked him again to please try to be more attentive when I am speaking. My biggest pet peeve is having to repeat myself which is something I need to do quite frequently around my DH.
We made an agreement that he would cook one dinner during the week and I would do the rest. I think that seems very reasonable and fair. The weekends are left up to circumstances. He admitted to me that sometimes he comes home and wonders what I've done all day. I admitted that I spend way more time on the computer than is necessary. So I am making an effort to be more aware of my computer usage and try to get my housework done first.
We also discussed our finances and he is considering letting me get a job. He was not agreeable to it the last time we discussed it. But he did let me in on what exactly is going on with our finances and it looks like we should be breathing easier come June. We've got one loan that will be paid off then and the money we've been paying on it every month can get put to other uses. My car loan is going to be paid off in 2.5 years. Thats not too bad. So we'll see what we decide about me working.
The last thing that we discussed was my being able to have ME time. I really feel like I need to get out by myself more for my own sanity. Just being able to run to the store without all this careful planning and waiting, plus 20 minutes to get a little boy out the door, would be soooooo nice. Even being able to sit on the computer for a few minutes alone without interruption would qualify.
So we'll see how things turn around in our house. I really hope this helps us.
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